Professor BuzzKill 
Member since Oct 21, 2010


The Egyptians had it right. The world is nothing more than a ball of dung and we are our own DungBeetles. If we are lucky,… More »

Favorite Places

  • None.
Find places »

Saved Events

  • Nada.
Find events »

Saved Stories

  • Nope.
Find stories »

Custom Lists

  • Zip.


  • No friends yet.
Become My Friend Find friends »


I See My FUTURE...and it is up in SMOKE!!!

Updated on November 4, 2010 at 4:27 AM

Recent Comments

Re: “Prop 19 Loses While Californians Resoundingly Endorse Local Pot Taxes, Regulation

Hello, Professor Buzz-Kill here and I would like to put my two 'grams' in on Prop 19 going up in smoke (couldn't resist the pun...sorry!!!).

1. First, I knew something BAD was going to happen because BAD NEWS ALWAYS COMES IN THREES for me. First, I got disqualified from the OAKLAND WEED Olympics because I tested positive for drugs (hey, go figure!!!). Second, my friend Zebadaiah spilt his bongwater all over my carpet and damnit, I just bought this car!!! And now PROP 19 has gone down in defeat!!!
2. Instead of feeling 'bummed', we should be dancing in the street because DUDE(s), we dodged a H-U-G-E bullet here!!! Everything has returned to the Status Quo and for the Gimp and Stoner Communities, that is a G-o-o-d Thing!!!
Marijuana IS 'more or less' LEGAL in California. You WALK your Stoner as* into a doctor's office and tell him/her you bruised your Shocktra, your MOJO don't stream as good as you did in your youth and that you are feeling suicidal ever since your fool of a roomate bet $500.00, at the start of the season, that the SF Giants would take the World Series and that he and your EX-Girlfriend (the skank) are now moving into a delux Condo overlooking Jack London Square!!! You lay this sorry trip on the doc and BOOM, you got your smoke card and all the couch-locking weed you can 'Bill Clinton' (inhale)!!!
5. We risked ALL OF THAT with the passage of PROP 19!!! ATTY GEN Holder agreed to lay off busting the dispensories and even GOV Swartzennegger dropped simple possession to an infraction because WE HAD A DEAL---sell the shit behind certified despensories and the feds don't be knockin'. We risked losing all of this and going back to the bad old days of New York White and Paraquat-laced Weed (Boy, am I showing my age!!!) for what? The chance to feel Self Righteous? The chance to bite the hand that feeds us? The chance to piss off 'both the man and the middle class'?!!!
6. When you put a marijauna seed into the soil, it doesn't grow like them magic seeds in Jack in the BeanStock---it needs time to sprout and grow and bud. It needs to be lovingly harvested (the stems and seeds removed) and then lovingly smoked with the right blacklight and music and dancing naked chicks in the background. That shit takes time, dude!!! Same with winning over the middle class (California and USA) and legalizing weed for recreational useage.
7. Medical Marijauna is a nacient industry that needs to be consolidated, it needs standardization, it needs corporate branding, it needs economy of scale, it needs quality control, it needs money for political lobbying and industry mobilization. Perhaps 3-5 years from now, MAYBE you could make the argument for total legalization and integration into the business community BUT the industry is too new to upturn the current orderly medical dispensory model for a Wild Wild West type capitalist business model.
8. Thinkers should Think and Stoners should Stone. What you DON'T want is Thinkers getting Stoned and Stoners Thinking---otherwise, they'll do something stupid like write another Prop 19-ish inititive.
9. PROTECT THE STATUS QOU AND LET THE MEDICAL MARIJUANA BUSINESS GROW!!! It's time to put out the fire and empty the bongwater on PROP19, Ya'll!!! Get Yer Card, Get your dope and keep it on the QT!!!

Posted by Professor BuzzKill on 11/04/2010 at 3:44 AM

Re: “Stoners Against Legalization

I have one mission in life and that is to 'De-Hippy-Fy' Marijuana. When I go into a liqour store to pick up my hooch, I don't talk about breaking out the black lites and beer bongs and Pink Floyd lps, I don't talk about re-claiming my Shocktra or Montra or Soul or Whatever from the government---I'm SIMPLY buying a six pack to drown my sorrows after watching the Raider's play (I'm Raider Nation or is that Ralph Nader-nation-Hug me?!!!).

I want Californians to be able to walk into a store and buy an 8Ball of Purple Alaskian Thudpucker with all the hipness and confidence of buying a ordinary box of tampons. People, marijuana is nothing more than a comodity, period. As an ADULT, you wish to consume a comodity and, as an Adult, you are aware of the health risks. THAT's It. When people like Press to Digitate talk about reclaiming their soul or cerebial processes from the government you marginalize all pot smokers as Fringe Anti Government Protesters---and we are decidedly are not--we're just a bunch of freakin' potheads!!!

Finally, about Press to Digitate's concerns that the government can read his thoughts---that is SO OLD NEWS!!! Remember David Korris and the Branch Dividians? The SOVIETS offered the Americans a use of a box that generated Ultra Low Frequencies where you could make people hear voices inside the bones in their ears (Voice of God stuff). And that was 80's OLD SCHOOL!!! Me? This XMAS I want that Japanese train set that you can think words to power it or make it switch tracks---it's $180.00 US Dollars. Dude, BIG Brother has not only arrived, he's drunk up all your beer and past out on your couch!!!

Posted by Professor BuzzKill on 10/21/2010 at 1:48 AM

Re: “Stoners Against Legalization

1. It goes without saying that Prop 19 is unstudied and poorly written
2. SO WHAT? All California Propositions are unstudied and poorly written!!!
3. Since 1+2=3 (pun), I plan to hold my nose and vote for it; I hope it loses.


There are more RAMIFICATIONS than APPLICATIONS and the authors have not thought that through enough.
A. Weed is essentually LEGAL in TOKING Districts---you can actually advertise 8balls with photos, THC % and $$$. Yes, you have to go through the motions of being medically screened but the requirement is so relaxed and catch-all as being meaningless.
B. Prop19 will do nothing for those who live in TOKELESS Districts.
C. Currently, there is no taxation in TOKING DISTRICTS. Yes, Prop19 allows for local communities to tax businesses but THERE IS NO STANDARDIZATION OF FEES, meaning Rancho Cordova, which really is against medical marijuana, can tax it out of existance ($15,000.00 year tax for individuals to grow their little 5X5' gardens?!!! Where Oaksterdam might charge $25.00 a year for the same privledge?).
D. Once Prop19 PASSES, the current business model will be thrown into the trash---which may or may not be a good thing.
E. Dispenseries, with all their pompus 'Hippy-Dippy' Drivel (Your Sockra and Aura will blossem with the Diesel Skunk but will approach Couch Lock on the Brown Ballroom Blitz) will be a thing of the past---I mean SOME will remain with their loyal patients but you won't be able to grow and most will wheither and die.
F. So, for the Recreational Pharma market do we establish Dutch Coffee Shops and people get it there or should Walmart have a SMOKE&TOKE Isle?
G. How about Bars/resturants/Concert Arenas and stuff? How do we reconcile SMOKEFREE Zones with TOKEFREE ZONES?!!!
H. Then, there is the Federal Government and the POTUS' right to kick the card table over and stop everything. I keep telling my Liberal Friends, the American Civil War had nothing to do with SLAVERY---it was all about STATES RIGHTS!!! In 1860, Some states in the Union permitted equal votes for women, a states rights issue and Some states were essentually DRY, again a states rights issue. Although the Slavery issue was solved in 1866, the issue of States Rights was not. 2010 TODAY, you can legally have sex with your sister and mother in what state? W. Virginia? Wrong---although you would THINK THAT. Try NEW JERSEY!!! What? Look it up!!! You will have to fight the Fed Government on States Rights just like GOV George Wallas did---Love me, Love me; I'm a Liberal!!!

Posted by Professor BuzzKill on 10/21/2010 at 1:17 AM

Most Popular Stories

© 2019 East Bay Express    All Rights Reserved
Powered by Foundation