Tuesday, April 19, 2011

A's prepare to endure 24 Hours of Red Sox Nation

By Kibby Kleiman
Tue, Apr 19, 2011 at 5:12 PM

In less than a day it will be all over. The Oakland Athletics play one home series this year against the Boston Red Sox, it starts tonight at 7:00 and ends sometime tomorrow around 4:00 p.m. And then the richest team north of the New York Yankees packs up, never to return in 2011. The schedule makers have seen to it that we get 400% more Detroit Tigers in our yearly diet than the Bosox, but considering the animosity Hub fans bring, it still feels like a deal worth celebrating.

The Sawx fans will speak, saying that they alone will fill the Coliseum. But is it worth selling a few more hot dogs if we have to listen to the Fenway faithful moan about how much better the red hots are in Boston?

We all know they've suffered. It took them eighty years to win a World Series, but now they are going to make the next eight decades wretched for the rest of the American League by wanting to both be the plucky little team in the cozy little ballpark and spend $200 million on the choicest free agents around. What could be tackier than a poor little rich team?

The Boston team has started this season 0-6. But they have shaken the gold dust out of their pockets long enough to recover to 5-10. Here's your super short list of redeeming features, which you better see fast because they'll be out of town by the time this sentence is finished.

They have two tiny middle infielders, who if they stood on piles of money might be 5 foot 9 combined.

They have about eight players named John or Jon

Everybody else is named Dan

They have a 44 year old pitcher, he will be paid enough so that he won't need social security this year.

They can't seem to beat the Baltimore Orioles who can't beat anyone else in baseball.

They took our old pitching coach Curt Young. I think they are paying him a lot of money.

Anyway, you get the point. They will arrive in Oakland with their "nation", they will fairly take over the Coliseum shouting out endearments to their favorites, they will complain about everything else and in less than a day they'll be gone.

With their payroll, they can afford another loss or two. Go A's.

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