Thursday, May 15, 2008

Slap Hitter: A's go to Cleveland bring back nothing.

Thu, May 15, 2008 at 2:02 PM

Zero was the A's magic number on this road stand.

Starting with the number of wins, we see that 0 is a repeating number. As in the number of runs scored by Oakland in three of the last six games.

Or the total of Frank Thomas home runs since becoming an A

Add in the number of hits the A's got with the tying run in scoring position, one out in the 9th and two Sweeeneys coming to the plate.

You get the idea; a real lost week. Sadly, the count, um down continues.

Zero is the number of good outings by reliever Andrew Brown after his scoreless streak came to an end.

The ebay value of that Travis Buck bobblehead toy.

The on-air chemistry between lead announcer Ken Korach and color guy Vince Cotroneo.

The number of columnists who predicted that if the season ended May 15, Oakland would win the wild-card.

The number who think they'll still be in that spot in September.

Total value earned on the Tim Hudson trade, which will be put in Oakland's face as they travel to Atlanta this weekend to face their old mate.

Points on the sensitivity scale as the A's travel to play teams named the Indians and Braves.

The value of those stats that used to get rolled out every year, about how the A's were the best team in the world when it came to interleague play.

The happiness A's fans get recalling how the boys in green got torched by St. Louis and New York in last season's interleague games.

The sense it makes that when you listen to the A's on the radio, the broadcast on the FM dial comes in about two seconds later than it does when you listen to AM.

The odds that anyone listens to the batshit programming on the AM dial when the A's game is over. A comedy act from 2002. Financial advice recorded from a well. Some guy's rebroadcast pirate radio show featuring some bands he alone knows. Random nightclub prattle.

The confidence I have that Huston Street will not start off the inning by giving up a double. And then a walk.

The number of times I want to be told that C.C. Sabathia "grew right up here in Vallejo."

The chances that the AM cast can even be heard in Vallejo.

The chances that the wheels might come off the bandwagon this week and no one will say "I told you so."

After a three-game sweep and a five of six losing roadie, how much better off we'd be if we were instead Giants fans.— Kibby Kleiman


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