Monday, November 13, 2006

"I Will Protect the Unspoiled Maidenhead of Dublin!"

By Chris Thompson
Mon, Nov 13, 2006 at 3:24 PM

Ever see those signs planted on East Bay median strips and flogging such services as DublinSingles.org or OaklandSingles.org? Well, one Dublin citizen has taken it upon himself to beautify the landscape by swiping every sign he drives past - and screaming obscenities into his camera in the process. As he deposits his latest culprit in the back seat, he notes, "Normally, the cocksucking, [unintelligible]-molesting, Taliban-sympathizing, adult-diaper-fetish-enjoying fuckfaces that run SanRamonSingles.org - normally, they would blight something much more beautiful than a sidewalk and a road." After the cops stop by to check him out, he turns his camera back on and explains, "I told them how it just filled me with contempt and rage that this DublinSingles.org bullshit was defacing the landscape, and I told them I felt the need to pull over and uproot it, so as to keep Dublin looking beautiful and unspoiled and unviolated by predatory, diseased, syphilitic sybarites." Sounds perfectly reasonable to us.

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